I have received my final results and have passed Spring Semester 2023! Boy, have I suffered! To everyone telling me to enjoy the process… NO! I have to go through it because I am convinced it is for the best. Still not enjoying my sleepless nights, missing shows, fun events, hanging by a thread because I am so tired, and living off caffeine? It is not enjoyable.
This semester tried me all the way because I started practicum, working full time, and had full-time classes. So, I recognized that my cup was full, and it was a struggle to juggle all of it. Am I happy with the turnout of my decision to refrain from certain activities which used to bring me so much joy, relief, or even money? I even had to cut my work hours even more to do a free internship because it is a requirement from the program, and I need to complete this master’s! In the middle of this all-time high inflation! So, no, I am not happy about it. Still, I know it is part of the process, so while there is no enjoyment at the moment, delayed gratification will show up sooner than later!
Enough about me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! How are you doing? Are your jaws clenched at the moment? Are your shoulders tense? When was the last time you stopped and breathed? If you answered, I don’t know, same friend, same! But am I trying? Yes, every day, I wake up and try again because it is not a race but a marathon; we’re playing long runs over here! What are you doing to take care of you? Have you finally realized there is nothing to be given if you’re empty? Most of my friends are now moms who work, and some are also pursuing higher education. While I command them to take on so many projects, I just cannot phantom how they even do it!
One thing I have learned throughout this semester is that your girl is not a superwoman! She cannot do it all. I am a fragile little thing that might be resilient but also would crumble and become overstimulated when so many things are thrown at me. Or I cannot give my best self because I am too tired to care enough. So, the word I am looking for is burnout, plain and simple! I prefer to do less and do it well than to do more and half of my job because I am juggling too many things at once. We might like to think that we are indispensable, irreplaceable in life, but that is a lie. We might be more efficient at some activities than others, but they still could only be done without our supervision. So, do not feel bad about saying no when your plate is complete or you may not want to be part of something. I actually enjoy saying do not feel guilty about it.
PS: I got nine more credits, two major exams, and adios to the Master’s Program! Good for me as the director of the Internship, like to say…HAHA!
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